Prior to this course, I would take comments about others in passing and not pay too much attention to them. This week I have reflected upon a couple examples of things I have overheard and have been said to me.
The Canadian
I overheard several people talking in a break room. One of the girls was sharing an incident of meeting a new guy who apparently was also interested in her friend but didn't realize the girls knew each other. The girl telling the story laughed about the situation and follows up with, "What do you expect? He's from Canada. They're just not that smart up there."
In this example, I wonder what the man would have felt if he had overheard this comment or if there were any other people in the break room who were of Canadian descent.
Age and Wisdom
I had a teacher who brought in excellent play based learning experiences and different projects with the kids. Our center has moved to individualized plans written by all staff including the assistants. In trying to work through this change, she shared with me how she has raised six children and they all have done well. She commented on her age and how paperwork wasn't her forte'. She explained that the paperwork was for the younger staff. All she wanted to do was play.
In this example, the judgment is made that only young staff can keep up with the demands of the paperwork. I also saw the correlation that her experience as a mother inadvertently made her a better teacher than the teachers without children. Both assumptions are untrue.
I do see that our society tends to find ways to share how they are better than others. There appears to be a limelight obsession with how great an individual is rather than celebrating the differences that make us who we are.
Like you, I am much more aware of microagressions after our course work this week. Your example about the Canadian was an example of humor used in a cruel way. This type of microinsult occurs all too frequently. It is also cowardly, because people who are called out for their aggression can say, “Don’t be so sensitive—I was just kidding.” It seems that many people are marginalized through others’ cruel humor on a regular basis.
ReplyDeleteArlene,
ReplyDeleteWe are under false pretentions when we 'think' like this. It is an incorrect thought process that leads to faulty reasoning. Same goes here with teaching....some teachers feel they are better because they have been through the ropes of raising their own. Having children allows us a different perspective to view things, but people without children can also have these views. These microaggressions do occur and are quite visible in our work. Nice insight.
Now that I am taking this course I am more aware what I say and what other say. It's amazing how much people will be microaggressive without even knowing it and acknowleding that they are hurting others feelings.
ReplyDeleteArlene,
ReplyDeleteIt is amazing how the enlightenment of microaggressions from this course can make you so much more aware of them in everyday life. Just like Dr. Sue said, its not always the overt, outright microaggressions that are the worst. It's the subtle unintentional ones that will cause the most damage. I think that expecting people to stop judging others will have to come with a whole change of mindset. That change and difference is a constant, and uniformity and conformity are really whats unacceptable.
Arlene,
ReplyDeletewow I wonder how the young man would have felt as well if he heard the comment the lady said. It's so easy for people to say statements such as these and not be aware of the hurt they can cause others. Completing this assignment has helped me become more aware of what others say how they may feel.